Dear Imaginary Friends,
Hello. This is my blog. I don't actually expect anyone to read this, but as long as you're here, I ought to get started. So, um, hello. As I said, this is my blog. And I, uh, didn't expect you to be here. Should I get started? Or maybe I should just ramble on a little longer, or-
Disclaimer: The writer of this blog does not take any responsibility for extreme boredom, headaches, dizziness, nausea, mental stimulation, comas, or any other unpleasant symptoms caused by the reading of his posts. You come at your own peril. Leave now. Don't say you weren't warned. We mean it. Go now-
Okay, okay, that's enough. You're scaring away all the imaginary readers! And beside, my posts are harmless! They'd never do anything like tha-
Disclaimer: There may be complete lies in this blog.
Oh, be quiet!
Thank you. I would like to assure you, Imaginary Friends, that I will always try my hardest to be honest. Apart from that, I can't guarantee the quality of this blog. I'll tell you what- why don't you expect that everything I write will be the worst garbage you've ever had the misfortune to read. That way, you won't be disappointed. :)
Actually, I'm just writing this blog for myself. I've got so much nonsense to spout out, but no one who will put up with it, so this seems like a good idea. I don't seriously expect any real people to put up with me anywhere in the world, but that's okay. My Imaginary Friends all over the world will do nicely, as will this wall here. Hey, that's not a bad idea. Wait a minute...
[three hours pass]
Oh, are you still here? I've just come back from the most pleasant conversation with a wall. I discussed with it my theories on videogame design, my philosophies and my emotions. The wall has unfortunately broken down as a result, but I am feeling much better. I haven't had anyone listen to me so carefully in months! Such a shame it had to end so quickly.
Who am I, you ask? (Okay, so you didn't, but let's say you did.) My name is Mordechai, but you can call me Mory. I am an Orthodox Jew, but I go to a secular school despite the very large number of religious schools here in Israel. I am now in the 12th and final grade, but I haven't actually learned anything in the miserable decade I've spent trapped in the school system. As a matter of fact, I'm not making any effort right now, even though all my tests are coming up and I'm sure to fail them. Somehow, they don't seem important. And despite this feeling, I am at a very good school - the Jerusalem Academy of Music and Dance, where I study (or at least am supposed to be studying) not just all the mundane subjects which other schools teach but also mundane musical studies. This, despite my not being very interested in music. Oh, and I compose. I have also been playing the piano for years despite never putting any effort into it. I'm not a good pianist mind you, not even good enough to play my own pieces properly, but somehow it was good enough to get me into this school, which I accepted despite my lack of interest because they'd let me in.
My class is very interesting. It is effectively split into three groups. The members of each group are friends with other members of that group, but there's virtually no contact between separate groups, despite going to most of the same classes. It's not that they dislike the other groups, more a sort of lack of desire to realize that the other groups exist at all. First, there are the dancers, who seem to be interested only in the shallowest things. Second, the musicians, who don't seem to be interested in anything at all. The third group is me. I like watching the dancers, and I like listening to music, but my love is for videogames, which I believe encompass the future of all of art-
Disclaimer: The writer of this blog will often enter mind-numbing passages and ramblings on the gloriousness of videogames. This is not enjoyable. Escape now, while you still can!!
So where was I? Oh, right, I was giving my boring autobiography, but I think that's pretty much it. If all the contradictions I've mentioned prevent you from getting a clear idea of who I am, I don't blame you. In every group I belong to, I'm apart from the crowd. So who am I, in a nutshell?
I am not.
Welcome to my blog. It may be incomprehensible, it may be meaningless, it may be a mess, it may be selfish, arrogant and self-degrading all at once, but- but....
You know what, let's just leave it at that. Welcome to my blog.
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